Family Praying in a Church. Image: The Catholic Sun |
To get acquainted with the Jatau family, flip to the
beginning; 'DAD, MUM…YOU FAILED US!'
She returned with chilled glasses of orange juice for
everybody. ‘I diluted yours, Dad, Mum. Y’all are too old for such
sweetness.’
No one but Oliver seemed ready to take their drinks.
Oliver gulped his and reached out to take Annabel’s. The look she gave him
would have quelled a more sensitive man. He shrugged and reclined further into
his seat.
Elizabeth felt she could continue. ‘Mum, as much as you
love us, you do not want us to have a mind of our own. You want us to look like
you and act like you do. My personality is similar to yours but even at
that, we are very different. The more different we are from you, the less
tolerant you are of our views. You may have taught us to be strong women, but
you only want us to be strong as long as we are not going against you. That is not
fair mummy.’
‘You asked me for my view before you divorced Dad and that
was the only moment I felt connected to you.’ Annabel continued immediately. ‘You
spoke to me like an adult and when I told you I would rather have you alive
than dead, I meant it. I am also glad that you did not wage a custody battle
for us. You knew that, with the messed up constitution we have, you would not
have stood a chance.'
Annabel gave a sign and her sisters came to her. They were now facing their parents again.
‘There are so many issues that we can mention but we will let
them slide for now. This is the summary. Dad, you were not a good father to us.
You were selfish, unbothered, and inappropriate with us. Gosh! You used to bring
your girlfriends to the house for sleepovers! You disrespected us and treated
us no better than strangers. Mum, you took your anger out at us and sometimes
beat us to the point of abuse. We understand that you grew up in a
different generation with different values and different ways of life but we
have friends whose parents were in your generation and are completely different
from you!’
After a quick breath, Annabel continued. ‘Dad, Mum…’ her
sisters rallied closely around her. Robert stiffened. Something major seemed
about to happen. Mr. Jatau looked up and looked at each of his daughters. For
the first time that night, he also looked at his ex-wife. They shared a look
and quickly looked away. Somehow, they knew that the next words out of
Annabel’s mouth would shatter them…probably more than they could bear. The
tears started flowing again from Annabel’s eyes. ‘…I am not getting
married. There is no one coming in for any introduction. This was just a ruse
to get both of you in one room to talk about this family.’
It was Oliver who reacted first. ‘What?! What?! Are you mad?! All the huge preparations and nothing is happening?!’
‘Shut up Oliver!’ both parents shouted. It was a sync that was
long coming! Oliver shut up faster than a hat could drop. He mumbled a bit to
himself and finally became quiet.
Mr. Jatau looked sharply at his children and sat up
straighter. A shiver of fear ran down their spines; all of them. They might all
be grown up but they knew that no one messed with their father.
‘Can you say that again?’ His voice was quiet yet menacing.
Annabel couldn’t find her voice. She was shivering and
fidgeting. She looked at her sisters and Robert. Robert looked away. Sandra
squeezed her hand and Elizabeth coughed. No one seemed willing to be the one
who would dare respond. As Annabel fidgeted, Elizabeth cleared her throat and
continued. ‘You know how in Africa, you don’t just marry the girl/boy,
you marry the family? Well, you raised us poorly, and worse, you put your
business out there for everyone to see. So, if we were to go by your history and
African values, we are not a family that anyone would like to marry into.’
Drawing courage from Elizabeth, Annabel found her
voice. ‘You messed up our lives. You refused to think of our future.
Many men have come for my hand and turned away because their families didn’t want
such a dysfunctional family as in-laws. So I only dated men who were as broken
as I was so that I wouldn’t have to face the pain of rejection again. Our
family is too warped to be good enough for any other African family. And that
is why we are here today.’ She paused to fill her lungs. After
exhaling slowly, she continued. ‘We grew up hating you; most especially
me. I hated you, Dad, as much as I hated Mum. I couldn’t stand you. As soon as I
got an opportunity to leave the house, I left for good. I wouldn’t have come
back home if Sandra hadn’t spoken to us’. She looked up at Sandra and
smiled. She ruffled her hair and faced their parents again. ‘She might
be the youngest, but she is the wisest of us all. She has been praying for the
restoration of this family and when she came to live with me a year ago, she
got me talking about this family. Soon, we invited Elizabeth and Robert and we
started having family sessions to iron things out.’
‘You might have hurt us but it turned out for good. We are
all intelligent, independent girls who have learned to be the best for ourselves
and the world. While we suffered a lack in the house, we never resorted to
selling our values for our needs. We learned to make do with what we had and
have. Most other girls would have thrown themselves at any Tom, Dick, or Harry to
make ends meet. Not us! Our situation made us develop self-esteem that was far
above what was normal and that kept us in check. We learned to work hard and
trust GOD and we learned to avoid all the potholes we saw in this family. It
was hard! Trust me, it was! Annabel dated lots of guys because she couldn’t
commit to one man who could ruin her life. She still doesn’t ever want to get
married but we are still praying for that.’ Elizabeth ended by playfully shoving
Annabel.
‘I am still not getting married! And y’all can’t make me.’ Annabel retorted.
Sandra smiled. ‘Never say never. You swore you would
never talk to Dad after your epic fight yet here you are. Anyway, Mum, and Dad, we
just want to put this out there. You hurt us. Really bad! You nearly messed up
our lives. We are broken and are just getting healed by the love that we have
found in GOD. For years, we disliked…’
Annabel cut in, ‘...hated..’ Sandra gave Annabel
a mock stink look and continued. ‘…DISLIKED you. But today, we are all
here to tell you that we love you…and we forgive you. As hard as it is, we
forgive you. And we want to tell you individually. Rob, let us start with you.’
Robert looked at the floor. ‘Dad, even though you never
treated me like your own son, even though you thought to ignore me, you gave me
a home when I couldn’t return to mine because of my romance with gang violence.
You ensured that I ate meals and all the perks. Today, I am a
married man who has learned so much and is learning more. When I fight with my
wife, I settle quickly to prevent a deterioration of my home. So, Dad, I forgive
you. You are the father I know; far better than my own father. Thank you for
being there for me.’ He sank into the couch as soon as he was done.
‘Elizabeth, your turn.’ Sandra whispered.
‘There were times I wished I was born into a totally
different family; one that didn’t have so much dysfunction. But I thank GOD for
this family because it made me stronger. It built my strength and pushed me to
become better. I am a great woman and my family has contributed to that
strength. So, I forgive you, Mum. I forgive you, Dad’.
Sandra and Elizabeth looked at Annabel. ‘Before
Annabel starts, Oliver, do you want to say anything?’
Oliver, looking emotional, sat up and faced his
parents. ‘I have not been to their sessions but then again, I am not
one to hold a grudge. I learned that from you, Dad. I cannot pretend that all
those times you put me down didn’t hurt me; they did! But hearing my sisters
voice out their issues, I know I had it a bit better. I cannot say I forgive
you because I still need to process these, but I will say that I am willing to
work on it.’
It was Annabel’s turn. The shivers wouldn’t stop. Everyone
knew that her biggest weakness was her inability to forgive. She could hold a
grudge to eternity and back and would not be fazed. Sandra prodded her but she
wouldn’t budge. She kept staring at the floor. Elizabeth prodded her too but
she still wouldn’t budge. The longer she waited, the more tears fell. Her head
was pounding and her nose running a mile.
‘We are all here because of you Annabel. You promised you
would do this.’ Elizabeth pleaded.
Annabel raised her head up. She looked at her sisters. She
looked at her father. She looked at her mother. She returned her gaze to the
floor.
She got up from her seat and left the room. Sandra wanted to
go after her. Elizabeth stopped her. ‘She will do this in her time. Let
her be.’ Sandra sat back down. In three minutes, Annabel was back. She went
straight to her father, sat on the armchair, and put her arm around him. ‘You
hurt me; a lot! I developed an aversion to love and commitment because I saw
how Mum suffered for loving you. I never wanted to get married because I could
not fathom being like Mum and ending up with a man like you. When you cheated
on Mum, I felt like you cheated on me. When you hit Mum, I felt like you hit
me. And when you broke her trust, I stopped trusting you; I stopped loving you.
But today…I…’ she squeezed his shoulder ‘…I forgive you, Dad. I
forgive you for hurting Mum, me, my sisters, my brothers, and worse, this
family. I forgive you because you didn’t know any better. And even if you did,
I still forgive you.'
She got up and went to her mum. She knelt in front of the
mother she had never been close to.
‘Mummy, I am that little girl who just wanted you to love me. I was broken by how much anger you directed at me. I bruise easily and you bruised me every time you spoke those sharp words, every time you said “You are just like your father!”, and every time you raised your hand to smack me. Yes! I am like my father! I look like him! I have a similar personality but I am also like you! My stubbornness and drive to be independent couldn’t have come from anyone else.’ She smiled and held her mother’s hand. Mrs. Jatau was crying. So was everyone else…including Mr. Jatau. ‘You are the only mother I have. I love you. And I forgive you.’
Annabel got up from her kneeling position and hurriedly left
the room. Elizabeth and Roberts followed her. Sandra gave Oliver a signal and
for the first time since she knew he was her big brother, he got it! He stood
up and also went out. Sandra rushed to the door as Mrs. Jatau got up. She
quickly went out and locked the door.
Mrs. Jatau went to the door and pulled. It wouldn’t budge.
She yanked harder. It still wouldn’t budge. ‘Open this door right now!
Sandra! Elizabeth! Open the door!’
Mr. Jatau’s phone started ringing. It was Annabel.
‘Why did you lock the door? Open it so your mother can go
out.’ He said calmly.
‘Daddy, put the phone on loudspeaker.’
He did.
‘Mum, come closer to the phone. I have a message for both of
you!’ Annabel said.
Her mum hissed and remained where she was.
‘She didn’t move, right?’ she asked as a smile crept
into her voice.
‘Yes. She didn’t.’ Mr. Jatau said resignedly.
‘Well, I didn’t think she would. Anyway, you are locked in as
you have figured out. All the exits are locked. Big ups to Sandra and Elizabeth
for the juice and pee distractions. We want you to talk. We are not asking that
you get back together. We just want you guys to talk. There is no need to be
enemies after being divorced for 18 years. Quite frankly, we are sick of it. We
want you to just talk; just put out all that anger and hatred and bitterness on
the table and sort them out. We cannot have a family that is going through a
cold war. The foundations of this family might have been faulty but we can
repair it now…and we need you to help us in this process. Please, talk to each
other and iron things out. And if you refuse to talk, rest assured that we
will not open this door, even if it takes forever. Love you guys. Ciao!’ and she hung up.
Mrs. Jatau went to the door and started knocking and
shouting. She was threatening hell and tsunami when she heard that voice she
hated.
‘There is no use putting this off any longer. I guess we have
come to that point where we must talk about our failed marriage. So please,
come and sit down.’ Mr. Jatau said.
Mrs. Jatau turned to him with a murderous look and you know
it is about to go down!
THE END!
The end? No! Wait! What happened to Mr. Jatau?? And Anabelle? This is awesome! It can't end like this! The father of all cliffhangers?!
ReplyDeleteDo family problems really end? LOL. Like I said, maybe there will be a Part III. We will see
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