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| Photo from the 2026 Men's Summit. Image Credit: YouthHub Africa |
By Victor Jacob
Conversations on gender equality and the fight against Gender-Based Violence (GBV) have gone on for as long as I can remember.
In 1991, the 16 Days of Activism against Gender-Based Violence campaign was launched, creating a global platform for conversations around violence against women and girls. More than three decades into this fight, we are no longer where we used to be. We have seen progress. Women are raising awareness for other women, challenging patriarchal systems and demanding spaces where their rights and voices are recognised.
But how much of this progress is lasting?
Too often, we celebrate short-lived progress without asking what happens after the campaign ends, the hashtag disappears, or the conversation moves on.
If we are truly looking at progress, then what we need is long-term and sustainable change: one that not only creates awareness, but changes behaviour, challenges harmful norms, and creates systems that can protect women even when nobody is watching.
And I think one way we as a society can truly make progress is by bringing men on board.
Men are not only part of the society where these problems exist; many also hold positions of influence within families, communities, religious institutions, workplaces, and government.
So, what happens when men move from simply supporting the conversation to becoming active allies in the fight for gender justice?
That was one of the questions at the centre of the YouthHubAfrica Men’s Summit 2026, which I attended on August 13, 2026, at the Shehu Musa Yar’Adua Centre in Abuja.
Held under the theme, “Reimagining Behavioural Change for Gender Justice: Men Championing Gender Equality,” the summit brought together voices from faith, traditional leadership, law, public health, policy, and youth advocacy to examine what it would take for men to become active participants in creating safer and more equal communities.
The idea of this gathering was not simply whether men should support gender equality. It was whether that support can be seen in their behaviour.
The Open Tea conversation, titled “Good Intentions Are Not Enough: What Real Allyship Looks Like,” featured Oluwatoyin Chukwudozie, Executive Director of Education As a Vaccine (EVA), and was moderated by Rotimi Olawale. The conversation looked at how patriarchy has shaped expectations around men and women, in what is often described as social norms or gender roles.
Men are often expected to be providers, decision-makers, and figures of authority, while women are expected to take on more responsibilities at home and in caregiving.
But what happens when what we call “normal” is also what keeps inequality alive?
Real allyship requires men to examine some of these beliefs and behaviours instead of simply accepting them because they are what they grew up with.
For Oluwatoyin, simply saying, “I am a good man,” is not enough. A man may believe he is good because he does not abuse women, but allyship requires more than simply refusing to cause harm. Oluwatoyin further shared that men also have to look at the spaces they occupy. What happens when their friends make sexist jokes, body-shame women, or make comments that reduce women to their appearance? Do they stay silent because they do not want to challenge the group?
Real allyship becomes more than good intentions and becomes more about being willing to challenge harmful behaviour, even when it comes from people around you.
Sometimes, being an ally means being uncomfortable enough to question what has always been considered normal.
The conversation then moved to the role of faith and tradition in gender justice, through a panel titled “From Gatekeepers to Allies: The Role of Faith and Tradition in Gender Justice.”
This was moderated by Sola Fagorusi, the Executive Director of Onelife Initiative. The panel featured Imam Abdul-Ganiyy Raji (National Da'wah Officer and Mission Board Secretary for the Nasrul-Lahi-L-Fatih Society – NASFAT), Rev. Fr. George Ehusani (a priest of the Catholic Diocese of Lokoja, Nigeria, and the Executive Director and Lead Faculty at the Lux Terra Leadership Foundation and the Psycho-Spiritual Institute), and HRH Istifanus Shegaje (Etsu of Chika).
Faith and tradition influence how many people understand marriage, family, authority, and gender roles. Now, because of this, the people who lead these institutions have an important role to play in challenging harmful practices.
Rev. Fr. George Ehusani addressed the question of the roles of religious leaders in addressing harmful practices around GBV discussion. He said that having responsibility begins with living out the values that faith teaches. He emphasised the example of Jesus in protecting the vulnerable and showing compassion, arguing that abuse and the Christian life cannot exist together. He also spoke about the responsibility that comes with marriage and family life. These include shared responsibilities at home, supporting one's partner, and creating safe homes should not be seen as a threat to masculinity. For faith leaders, this also means creating safeguarding policies, holding people accountable, and creating programmes that engage men and boys in conversations around behaviour and responsibility.
HRH Istifanus Shegaje brought the conversation to tradition and culture. Basically, the question was: how can culture and tradition be preserved and, at the same time, be able to ensure that there is equal justice for women in the communities?
For him, preserving culture should not mean preserving every practice associated with it, especially when it does not consider women or is even harmful to women. He talked about Traditional leaders organizing community meetings, youth groups, and other platforms to question harmful norms while still protecting the values that hold the communities together.
Imam Abdul-Ganiyy Raji approached the issue from the Islamic perspective, emphasising that religious leadership should go beyond worship and serve as a reference to God, empathy, and love towards women. Religious leaders should use their influence to educate communities about gender-based violence, encourage reporting, and support families through mediation, as he does with his community, NASFAT.
He also spoke about the importance of positive masculinity, responsible fatherhood, and creating space for women to pursue their skills and aspirations. His contribution also highlighted the importance of educating girls. If religious and community leaders have the ability to influence how families understand the role of women and girls, then that influence can also be used to challenge practices that limit their opportunities.
What connected the three perspectives was the recognition that influence comes with responsibility. Faith and tradition can either reinforce harmful expectations or become part of the solution when their leaders are willing to question practices that cause harm.
The conversation on gender justice eventually came back to the question at the heart of the summit: what does it actually mean for men to become active allies in ending GBV?
This session, “From Bystanders to Active Allies: Engaging Men in Behavioural Change to End GBV,” featured Dr. Izeduwa Derex-Briggs, Raheela Dauda, and Nafisa Atiku-Adejuwon, with Andrea Kwen (Legal Practitioner) as moderator.
Dr. Izeduwa is a prominent Nigeria Medical Doctor, Public Health Specialist, and Program Officer for the Ford Foundation in West Africa. She led the conversation and brought to light that they haven't had much success in the fight against GBV; this, she said, was as a result of very few men being part of GBV conversations. She addressed the fact that men and boys are so willing to protect only their own women and girls in the family from being victims of rape and abuse, and are not concerned if it happens to anyone else, stating that this itself is not a true way of being real allies.
Men who are simply not being a perpetrator does not automatically make them allies. Men challenging these harmful acts are truly what make them allies
Raheela Dauda, a Senior Legal Officer at FIDA Nigeria, also highlighted the challenges survivors face when trying to seek justice, which included ineffective police gender desks, stigma, victim-blaming, and delays in responding to cases relating to GBV. She highlighted that awareness alone cannot solve GBV if the systems people depend on for protection and justice are not working effectively. It also becomes difficult for survivors to seek help when they face economic dependence or lack the resources to leave harmful situations. This is why women's empowerment, education, and access to opportunities are also part of the wider conversation around preventing GBV.
The discussion also challenged the tendency of some men to respond to conversations about violence against women with “not all men.” The point is not to accuse every man of being violent. It is to encourage men to listen, support survivors, and take responsibility for challenging the behaviour of other men.
Nafisa Atiku-Adejuwon, a Gender Policy Inclusion Strategist, further broadened the conversation by pointing out that gender-based inequality goes beyond physical violence and that those involved in it are only acting out in accordance with the patriarchal ecosystem that they have been brought up in. She also talked about women being at the low end of power, pointing out various sectors around the world: sectors in finance, education, even politics. Men have a responsibility to create a more inclusive and equitable ecosystem where every gender has a say in the affairs of the state
This made the meaning of allyship clearer to me. It is not about choosing a side in a competition between men and women. It is about creating a society where people can live without violence, discrimination, and exclusion.
Another conversation at the summit focused on “Addressing Social Norms, Education, Policy and Collective Action in Ending Child Marriage.” The discussion brought together Abbas Adamu, Dr. Yemisi Chiamaka Nathaniel, Fatima Bello Aminu and Dr. Hussain Abdu, with Gbemisola Joel-Osoba as moderator.
The question for this panel session was: when poverty starts to affect the future of a girl child and her education, what exactly should be the role of her parents, government, and religious leaders in ending child marriage?
Fatima, Co-Lead, EmpowerHer Education Project and Centre for Girls Education, kicked off the conversation. She spoke on how early marriage is still seen as a way of securing a girl’s future or reducing the financial pressure on her family. Parents, traditional and religious leaders, schools, government and communities all have a role to play. Men and boys also have to be part of this conversation, especially because they often influence decisions made within families and communities.
Abbas, a Development Practitioner and Policy Advocate, spoke on the measures that he and his team have used to function in states like Jigawa and Kano. He pointed out that their attempts in the community were not just to come and advocate for matters on GBV but to change its drivers themselves into becoming allies in the fight against GBV and matters on early child marriage. He described these drivers as men in high societal positions (community leaders), fathers to daughters, husbands to wives, and even brothers, who are the demographic that will be used to create change in their societies.
Dr. Yemisi, a Director of Programmes at Women’s Rights Advancement and Protection Alternative (WRAPA), spoke on WRAPA using a holistic approach that doesn't just address the issue of GBV or child marriage but looks for the drivers of such practices – men in power and leadership – to be active champions in the fight against these norms.
She spoke on it being a form of gender transformative approach that is necessary for these men to become champions and a support system for girls who may want to be forced into child marriage. Men championing requires him being at the point he is convinced and challenge these norms.
Beyond the panel discussions, the summit also created room for participants to engage with the issues in less formal ways, including the Level Up Card Game and a spoken-word performance advocating for gender justice by Zainab Tijani Mohammed.
These moments were a reminder that conversations around gender justice do not always have to happen through formal speeches and panel sessions. Sometimes, people engage differently when they are allowed to reflect, ask questions, and see these issues from another perspective.
The spoken-word performance, in particular, brought another dimension to the conversations around masculinity, responsibility, and accountability, and why the ecosystem of patriarchy and its dynamics needs to change.
But for me, the more important question was what happens after these conversations end.
It has created awareness and addressed matters on GBV and Child Marriage; now men in the room need to find out how they can be better advocates and allies who champion and support women and girls everywhere.
After more than three decades of conversations around gender equality and GBV, perhaps the next stage should be less about how many people have heard the message and more about how many are willing to live by it.
The real test of allyship will not always happen in rooms filled with cameras, hashtags and microphones. It will happen when a man challenges his friend for making a sexist comment. When a father supports his daughter’s education. When a husband sees household responsibilities as something to be shared. When a religious leader takes a survivor seriously. When a traditional leader is willing to question a harmful practice. When a colleague speaks up instead of looking away.
As someone working with Shades of Us, I have come to see how important it is to keep these conversations going beyond events and campaigns. Storytelling is a powerful tool we utilize to help bring attention to these issues that are often normalised or left unspoken, but the goal should not be to simply tell more stories. We use these stories to encourage people to question what they have accepted as normal and think about what they can do differently. For us, real change requires people to continue the work in their homes, communities, workplaces, religious spaces, and institutions.
For those who attended the summit, the message was clear, and the summit may have ended, but the responsibility does not end when people leave the room.
Allyship is demonstrated through repeated choices. The question, then, is no longer whether men support gender equality. It is whether they are willing to live it.
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